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“Actually, since you’re asking, I fucked your tia, Aunt Veronica! Is that so bad? I did it eight times now since the wedding, plus twice before it, including on the wedding day itself when the stripper left me with awful blue balls. I’m pretty sure that I knocked her up, in fact. I also banged her son, Rafael, when he was in drag. Does that upset you? Oh, wait, that’s silly to ask, given the ray gun. In my defense, I was drunk with Rafi. That’s not all. I also boffed your friend, your bridesmaid, Lola, you know ... a few times, and your other one, Whitney. You know, the black one. I seem to recall you having two bridesmaids named Whitney, which was confusing as fuck,” Ernie confessed some of his escapades so far at least.“Yeah, white Whitney is actually named Whitney Tavington, whereas black Whitney is named Whitney White. No joke. The black Whitney has ‘white’ for her last name. You can’t make this shit up, either! Anyway, I used to get pissed-off for weird-ass reasons, Dan can. It took me a while to decide what it was that I wanted from her. She was already sexy as hell but I could certainly see her in shorter outfits. She never cared for anal sex so I wanted a lot more of that. Then there was the fact that our fifteen-year-old son masturbated to thoughts of his beautiful mother every night as he fell asleep.Getting her to cooperate would not be a problem. Jack, Ted, and Sam were all happily married. All I would have to do was to threaten to tell their wives.So one day I was waiting for her to come out of her boss’ house. She turned white as a ghost when she saw me. I told her to follow me home and started driving away. She got in her car and followed me right into our garage.I helped her out of her car and positioned her over the hood of her car for a search like I had seen a million times on television. She was bent over holding herself up with her hands while her feet were back and spread. She started to explain why she had been there but I shut her off..
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